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Quote for the Day ...

"Fear no more, says the heart. Fear no more, says the heart, committing its burden to some sea which sighs collectively for all sorrows, and renews, begins, collects, lets fall."

- Virginia Woolf,

Oct. 15, 1999

On Becoming a Teenager's Mom

I'm writing this today out of self-preservation. My firstborn, two weeks shy of officially being a teenager, and his father this morning boarded a rubber raft for a whitewater trip down the New River in West Virginia as members of a group of Boy Scouts from our town.

In my head I know this is a good thing, their opportunity to share an adventure and further cement their father-son bond. Outside I am calm, but inside I am chilled to the bone and my heart is shrieking. I know this feeling well for I have caused it often enough in my own parents. It will last for now until I hear that all is well. But it will never really go away.

Lately my son has been testing the waters, dropping little hints of things to come to gauge my reaction: taking up hunting (you'd shoot Bambi's mom?), playing football (not in my lifetime), driving a sports car (our old Suburban is looking better every day), dating girls (when you're 30), bungee jumping (not in my lifetime). His eyes sparkle with delight each time I give him the answers he expects, the ones that aren't necessarily true but nevertheless remind him that I love him.

It's a little dance we do. If I don't score high enough on the worrying-mother scale, he'll raise the bar with additional gorey details of the dangers involved. There is, however, some room for negotiation:

• Hunting -- if you must, be safe, be swift, be ethical. I'm a city-raised girl but hunting is so much a part of the culture here, I've had to force myself into accepting this. But no bird feet in the freezer!
• Playing football -- train well, lift weights, wear pads, pray you can outrun the bigger guys!
• Driving a sports car - - big, heavy, survive crashes... tiny, cute, be squashed like a bug. Chant with me .... SUV, SUV, SUV.
• Dating girls - - okay, maybe when you're 16. And Dad is with you.
• Bungee jumping -- definitely NOT in my lifetime.
• Whitewater rafting -- hold on, hold on, oh God please hold on tight! (If you fall out, Dad BETTER catch you!)

And so the dance continues. It's a dance I know will not last long and therefore one for which on most days I am grateful. Except for today, of course, until the phone rings.*

Webcurrents Catch of the Day ...

Upload and share your family photos for free at zing.com, a great find courtesy Mark Richardson, scoutmaster for Boy Scout Troop 166 and also our state representative.

* Footnote: Everyone arrived home tired but safe. See: Troop 166 Mystery Trip photos.

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c. 1999-2000 Julie Wolpers, Webcurrent Communications

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